In A.A., time is often paradoxical. However much we strive for long-term sobriety we are truly only sober for “one day at a time.” Yet, early in my sobriety, a woman sharing in an open meeting opined that, “Time takes time.”

Some of those in the meeting looked at her quizzically, others with mirth; many rolled their eyes at her. Her seeming truism amused all of us in the hall and gentle laughter ensued while her face blushed red with embarassment. Of course, time takes time; how could it not? The statement was painfully obvious. She moved on to speak of other things, but what she said lingered in my mind well past the end of the meeting.

Looking back on it, I can’t possibly know what she meant in speaking this seemingfaux pas, but I have thought on it long enough to know what it means to me. Newly sober individuals look to those who have long-term sobriety in the program as role models and mentors. Therefore, in a very simplistic way (and one that will suffice for now), the reference to time is really a reference to the experience, maturity and sobriety gained in working their program along with the long-term sobriety they have attained.

Put in this perspective, the words ring true and relevant despite the initial laughter that greeted the phrase. The more time we have in the program, the more time we give to our program, the more we give back to others in the program, the more likely we are to succeed in a deep and long-term sobriety. There is no doubt then that time really does take time.

Peace out,
M